31 year old, married to someone who is arguably the most wonderful man to have graced the planet, 168cm tall, 56kg, fit, healthy, runner, theatre nut, good career, plenty of friends, a good family…..blah, blah, blah….

And the reason I’m here? Diagnosed as ‘lean’ pcos (no symptoms other than (in)fertility and ovarian cysts), 2 years trying, 18 months of fertility treatments. First pregnancy in August 2014, which ended at around 9 weeks, followed by another in November and another in January 2015. 3 in 3 months, pretty much to the day.

This is blog is my way of talking. I am like so many other (in)fertile women in that I deserve a Masters degree in Acting Like I’m Absolutely Fine But Really I’m Emotionally Dying. Possibly like you, I’m the kind of girl that responds with “Yeah, I’m GREAT, thanks!” when asked how they’re doing, despite being told just hours before that this ttc shizzle has to be postponed yet again because your body doesn’t want to play. I don’t really tend to say to anyone how my insides feel twisted and raw, or that I want to flick women who moan about their kids or their pregnancy or their stretch marks, or that when I see another pregnancy announcement, I cry like it’s going to go out of fashion. But I’m assured it’s pretty normal, so I guess that’s something.

Apologies for any self-indulgent misery. And if it helps anyone else feel less alone in the process, then I’m happy. Well, not ‘happy’, like having a real life baby of our own in our arms happy, but happy.

You know what I mean 😉

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